Teach English in Dongguo Zhen - Yuncheng Shi

One of many roles as a teacher in a classroom is as a lecturer. Someone who can verbally communicate their knowledge and insight to an audience of students. I admire those who have charisma and can captivate an audience with just their presence in the spotlight. The way that great public speakers can change the tone, volume and speed of their voice, have a look of confidence and ease while use gestures and subtle movements to emphasize and mesmerize an audience is something that I strive for as a teacher. Due to my introverted nature, growing up I would often play alone or at most with one other friend. I would often ignore or decline invitations from friends to play in large groups even when I was available and I would never have a large circle of friends. I felt that being around so many people brought upon mental exhaustion and preferred to spend time outdoors alone. I believe that many of my current students see me as a confident speaker, but when it comes to standing in the front of the classroom, I was not always that way and I’ve only become more comfortable with experience. As a child, I can recall when as soon as it would be my turn to talk in front of others, all color would drain from my face, my voice would be unsteady and uncertain as I never looked up from my shaking hands as I held on for dear life to my speech notes. Once the speech was finished, I would bury my head in shame at the trauma that had ensued and would have flashbacks of the terrifying moment leading up to the next school assignment that involved a presentation. It was a mental block that would stay with me well into adulthood. As I grew older, I became aware that regardless of what career you intend to pursue, at some point everyone needs to have the ability to repeat memorized information: whether it’s a formal presentation, a farewell speech, or even an interview. The mental block stemmed from the thought pattern that I didn’t want to be viewed as incapable or inferior in the eyes of others. How I was able to overcome the feeling of judgement and gain confidence was the epiphany that I needed to stop worrying about what other people thought of me. By putting the control of my thought patterns back into my own hands, I was able to take the steps necessary to face my fears of the spotlight. When I first started teaching, I was in fact nervous being put into a new classroom with students that I didn’t know. The advantage of being a teacher is that you don’t often teach in new classrooms with new students every day. Over time we build bonds with our students to which we can then tailor our lesson to make the learning experience more personal and engaging. When I was younger, I felt that teaching was a one-lane highway of information but through experience I have found that teachers also learn from their students which is why I believe that all lessons should involve the students’ thoughts and ideas. Moving away from a lecturing style and giving opportunities for open discussion allowed me to still be at the front of the classroom to facilitate and summarize or highlight key points from the students. One of the main ways I was able to overcome my fear of presenting was by the simple act of smiling. I think that smiling is infectious and students can tell if you are genuinely happy and enjoying yourself. I believe that by bringing this positive attitude, students respond through smiling which causes you to continue to smile. This creates a positive feedback loop. Before when I did public speaking, I was overcome with dread and anxiety and I’m sure it was visible through my fearful fight-or-flight responses. But through smiling, I was able to calm my mind which resulted in a more natural and clear flow of speech. Due to my history with social anxiety of public speaking, some may wonder why I became a teacher. My dream is to be in a position that allows me to inspire and positively influence as many young minds as I can to bring a brighter tomorrow. I used to hide from the spotlight and felt that I performed my best behind the scenes in the shadows. But just like the message I want to leave with my students, to grow one must face the challenges and fears that hold them back and only then will you achieve more than you ever thought imaginable. As an adult and teacher, I too am still growing and learning and thus forever a student as well. Admittedly, even to this day, I still become nervous presenting in front of others. Only now I go into it with the mindset that it is a gift to be given time on the stage and to put my best foot forward while I am on it.